Monday, April 6, 2009

What's In A Name?

Ah yes, band names. Some are great and you know what the band is going to sound like just by hearing the name. Examples are: Black Sabbath, Slayer, Pantera, Cannibal Corpse, Celtic Frost, etc. Some names, on the other hand, are just fucking stupid. Here is a list of some of the worst names for metal bands I have ever heard:
A Kid Hereafter in the Grinding Light
A King's Worthy Mustache
All the Heathers are Dying
Arsonists Get All the Girls
Black Letter for a Rotten Heart
Bringing Down Broadway
Clinging to the Trees of a Forest Fire
Cross the Lips of Grace
Decapitation Done by Helicopter
Decompose My Dying Daughter
Five Characters in Search of an Exit
Fuck Your Shadow From Behind
Giddy Up Gangsta
Hester Prynne
I Don't Want to Die in Texas
I Wrestled a Bear Once
Job For a Cowboy
Kids Will be Skeletons
Life Goes on Without Me
Like Peter at Home
May the Force be With You
Messages Via Carrier Pigeon
My Son My Executioner
No Penguins in Alaska
Poolside at the Flamingo
Seven Last Words of Christ
Spider Killed Bananaman
Success Will Write Apocalypse Across the Sky
Terminally Your Aborted Ghost
The Bad Luck 13 Extravaganza
The Boy Will Drown
The New Tony Bennett
The Texas Chainsaw Mascara
To Envy the Horrid
To Outlive the Beginning
What's He Building in There? (Not metal, but had to get them in)

Basic rule of thumb: If your band name is a complete sentence, think of another fucking name.

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